How to Stop Making Excuses
Want to discover how to stop making excuses? Of course you do….or maybe you don’t realize you are making excuses? Either way I am here to help and if you are not achieving your goals then I bet this article could really help you.
So here’s what I know, successful people give explanations and non successful people give excuses.
Now often times we don’t realize we are making excuses or using words that are self sabotaging our efforts to move us closer towards our goals.
Our excuses show up in the form of the victim mentality, the negative mind, the insecure person, the procrastinator.
So here’s an example….
When I first started my with my business online, I was told by my mentor that I needed to start doing webinars. I was completely nervous about this. I was worried I would mess up or sound nervous to my audience. I was worried no one would even show up. I was fearful of what people would think…. but the big kicker was I would always find something I needed to do before I could actually sit down and prepare for the webinar.
Such as my kids needed help with their schoolwork, the house needed to be cleaned, errands needed to be done, they were once not a priority but all of sudden needed to be done that day or all hell would break lose.
There was also a time when I knew I needed to launch my own course on my own, but I found every reason (let’s really call them excuses) to not get it done.
What I realized was that I was making up excuses to avoid doing what I knew I needed to do and that was prepare for the webinar or hire mentoring to help me break through my barriers that were holding me back in regards to launching my own product.
I was procrastinating and coming up with all kinds of excuses as to why I couldn’t get to that webinar or why I couldn’t create and launch my very own product. I actually believed those excuses.
Oh and trust me if you knew me, you would have believed me too. I was convincing. I “had “ to cook dinner all of a sudden, when at that time I never cooked dinner! We were always a go out to eat kind of family. You see in my mind I convinced myself that these were important distractions had to be done.
Now you might not know this from looking in from the outside, but I wasn’t too successful at making excuses instead I ended up creating a patterned behavior in my business, until I finally recognized what I was doing.
You see you won’t hear successful people say, “sorry I couldn’t get that blog post written today, because my internet connection was bad.”
Or… “sorry I would have done that video today, but the lighting was just off in my office.”
Instead you would hear the successful person say, “Sorry I didn’t get that blog post written, I should have gone to Starbucks and used their internet connection.”
Or… “Sorry I didn’t get that video done, I really should have just gone outside and used natural lighting.”
Do you see how those statements are very different?
Successful people recognize the difference between and explanation and an excuse. When you explain the truth behind what’s holding you back you accept full responsibility without placing blame on someone or something else.
It’s much easier and it makes us feel much better about ourselves to just blame, avoid responsibility and the consequences by just making excuses.
So you may be sitting there right now thinking… you are making excuses too and not creating explanations. You know what you need to do to get to the next level, but you just aren’t doing it for whatever reason.
Therefore, the next step is to become aware of what you are doing when you are making excuses. Start today by listening to your words and start explaining why you didn’t do something.
You can also explain why you were unable to accomplish something, as this will be your turning point to reaching your goals instead of letting your excuses sabotage your efforts.
Why didn’t you make those phone calls today? Listen to your answer. Make sure you are explaining and not making excuses.
Why didn’t you generate 10 leads today?
Why didn’t you get that blog post done?
Why didn’t you create value in the marketplace today?
Because you ______ (fill in the blank here, but take responsibility for your actions)
I talk to people every single day and hear all kinds of excuses.
Excuses that the person on the other end actually believes and tries to convince me and others to believe.
Sadly this behavior can be self destructive especially when it becomes a habit you are completely unaware of .
Many of you are already in the habit and don’t even know it, so I am challenging you on today to change that habit and stop making excuses.
So let’s talk about why we make excuses.
It’s really all about the consequences. Making excuses in our own mind will hopefully relive us from any consequences.
“Awe I was late because the traffic was so bad.” See it’s not my fault. When what I should of said was, “awe I am late, I really should have left earlier, next time I will.”
Or how about, “I can’t afford to go to that next mastermind event, I am out of money.”
Let me ask you when you use this kind of language what are you seeking? Pity? Maybe you won’t be held accountable because it’s not your fault? I mean you can’t afford it, right??
All right, so you can’t afford it? The better statement would be, I can’t afford this next event I want to go to, so what can I do about that today so I can afford it? What might I do to change that?
You see the difference? You are now in action mode and not in cop out mode.
Do you see how the first statement can keep you from success ( I can’t afford it because I don’t have the money)and the second one ( what might I do about that) will help you move towards success?
Again….I challenge you to listen to your words today.
Nobody likes the feeling of not being able to do something they want so bad. But by saying I had no choice, I have no other options, it reduces that emotional discomfort you will feel by allowing yourself to believe your excuses.
Making excuses and believing your own excuses are keeping you from success, I promise you that. You are conditioning yourself not to be resourceful. I can say this with 100% certainty if you want to be an entrepreneur you need to be resourceful.
The buck doesn’t just stop where the excuse is made, there needs to be a question that you ask yourself: “what might I do to make this happen?” “What might I do different next time?” “What might I do right now to change this situation?”
If you don’t ask yourself these questions you are keeping yourself from achieving the success you deserve.
It takes some time to create this habit by changing your language. But with a bit of self discipline you can reach your goals. If you are always trying to rationalize your actions and behavior your going to stay stuck.
Bottom line, successful people create results. You tell me it can’t be done? I will find a way to get it done. If I fail I look for the reasons why and I own up to it. So should you. Accept full responsibility for your actions, the things that you say, how you react without blaming something or someone.
It doesn’t serve you to waste your time and energy justifying why you should not be held accountable for your failures.
When you fail, as many successful people do, you want to do what successful people do which is analyze your role in the failing process. Where did you go wrong? How can you do better next time? Own it and ask yourself how you are going to do better the next time to reach your goals.
Finally as I mentioned earlier I hear all kinds of excuses. Heck I think I’ve heard them all. So I also want to help you know how to respond to excuses like we do in our business when someone comes to us with one.
First understand the person probably does not realize they are making excuses.
Next time you hear someone make what appears to be an excuse, ask them, “what might they do to change that?”
“What might you do next?”
“Great! What might you do better next time?”
You’d be surprised what you will hear in return by asking thought provoking questions and you will be helping to change the direction of that person’s behavior to a more productive mindset that will hopefully help them get closer to their goals.
I just had a guy the other day say I only have $49 to invest. My response, “great now what might you do to get more money to invest because it’s going to require a larger investment?”
Or…. Here’s another one, “nothing seems to work and I am not making any money!”
My response, “okay what might you do to change that current situation of yours?”
“I bought in a few months ago and really have done nothing with this program, but I am ready to get started, but I really need some hand holding and help.”
“Okay great! I am happy you found your desire to get started again, now what might you do now to get the ball rolling?”
“I bought a solo ad and got 100 leads and no one bought. Solo ads suck!”
You have to lead the person to face the real problem. The only way they will face it is by asking questions like….
“What might you do different?”
“Could you maybe create a better follow up?”
“Are you emailing regularly?”
“Are you sharing value?”
“Are you taking time to get to know your subscribers?”
“Are you offering to genuinely help them?”
All possible solutions.
Now one thing we can’t ignore, is some people just don’t have a why bigger than their excuses. I will say this from my past experience.
The entrepreneur journey is not a pretty road when moving towards your goals. It’s take a lot of time, energy, failures, and you will experience obstacles galore. You will be tested to see how tough you are, but the one thing I know is in order to stay in the game and not give up, you need to have a WHY bigger than any obstacle or excuse that comes your way.
So are you ready to stop making excuses and move towards your goals faster?
CLICK HERE NOW to learn how you can partner with Michelle and me so that you can get an action plan, tap into our training and resources and finally get unstuck in your business!