Painful MLM Truth
painful mlm truth
I sit here this evening at 11:46 PM and have come to a painful MLM truth realization. Yes, I will probably get criticized for this but, I feel I need to share this with you if you are an up and coming leader or are just getting started in this industry and have plans on being a successful leader. Save yourself some time and listen up. Learn from what I have discovered and gone through. Mistakes are great, it only means you are growing. By the way…..this is Michelle (me) writing this.
I have wasted a lot of my precious time which quite frankly is now worth about $750 bucks at least an hour. I have put my heart and soul into students only for them to suck the energy and time out of me and quit. Painful MLM truth, it’s all my FAULT.
Painful MLM Truth in Leadership
My leadership and business has been on overdrive since April of 2011. I have created a 6 figure income in a very short time, recognized as one of the top leaders inside of My Lead System Pro / MLSP, generated over 30K in sales in just 2 hours and one of the top recruiters in my business. I have spoken at Live the Dream II event and other various events locally. I have been asked to conduct my Facebook training webinars for several lists of 7 figure and 8 figure earners in our industry. I have been mentored by the best in our industry and have no plans on stopping now. Only to name a few here….
I guess I have always contributed some of this success to helping others and offering to reach out to take their hand. As Mark Hoverson just told me recently I am a teacher at heart and this may not be the best when it comes to selling. His theory, you need to leave just enough on the table to make people want more. If you leave too much on the table people will feel full and not crave more. Result…..lack of sales. Sadly, my teaching heart, I believe may have actually been holding me back.
Let me give you a few examples: We sign people up in My Lead System Pro / MLSP everyday and I offer our members on our team weekly training webinars, take their calls and answer all their emails, skype calls, text messages in regards to their obstacles. No matter how much training I have offered in the past, I still find many don’t actually show up. Then when they want help, I quickly realize I already taught that in a training and they could of simply attended and we wouldn’t be having a conversation at all. What I have come to realize is I am babysitting. I am catering to the “I can’t do it” mentality. I am enabling this lack of perseverance by being their go to person as soon as they hit an obstacle. Result….attracting non motivated, non driven individuals that do not have the strength to figure out how to overcome the obstacles on their own. While I always knew this in the back of my head and at times would bang my head against the wall, I continued this behavior. Bottom line is…..Bill and I have the same tools each and everyone of you have, that’s right there inside MLSP / My Lead System Pro, so why am I acting like support?
Stop the whining, complaining, and step up to the game and make it happen just as we did. We all have the same access to the same tools it boils down to how you use them to your advantage.
Painful MLM Truth Example II:
I have recently recruited several people into my Numis business or GRN business who have simply just fallen off the face of the earth. Okay let’s just call it what it is….they QUIT. Why did they quit? Well truthfully in my opinion they didn’t have a big enough emotion and drive behind their “why” to overcome the obstacles. Really to be honest, it’s the last time I put my time into someone unless they prove to me they can be self sufficient and I can see some results. Yes, there….I said it. I have officially become one of those “gurus” and the funny thing is…..I once took pride in myself because I wasn’t like those “gurus”. Shame on me, now I understand why they have to do what they do. If they didn’t they wouldn’t find the cream of the crop. The individuals that are capable of rising up out of the crowd of people who don’t have what it takes to make it.
Don’t get me wrong here and say, “Gee Michelle, that’s a little harsh.” I have a great training program in place for any new person that joins my team and I am 110% confident that if they follow it they can succeed, that’s if they have a big enough “why”.
As I have said in the past, this business is NOT easy and if you don’t have a big enough “why” then you probably should just go back to finding yourself a boss. Because…here’s the painful mlm truth, if your why is something along the lines of:
- I want more money
- I want to stay home with my kids
- I want to travel the world
- I want to be my own boss
- I want set my own schedule
- etc….
Then I want to ask you, who doesn’t want those things? Those reasons are not big enough, defined enough or full of clarity to get you through the obstacles you are going to face in your journey to get to 6 or 7 figures.
Get yourself a pen and paper and write your “why” then write a paragraph packed with emotion behind why you want what you are seeking. If you can’t truly clarify it with deep emotion then it isn’t big enough! You will know if your “why” is backed with emotion when you can clearly state it and say “DAMN IT! I am going to make it happen come hell or high water!” “I don’t care how big the mountain is or how impossible it is to climb!” “I WILL CLIMB IT!”
Trust me you will need it because once you hit that obstacle and not the first one or the second one, it will be the ones after that, you will need more of that original emotion to get you through it. If you don’t you will turn your reasons into excuses as to why you can’t do it. Oh, trust me…..I have heard them all and people are REAL good at convincing themselves they have a good reason when in reality it’s just an excuse in the eyes of the smart ones.
Get it?
Okay, so back to the people who quit. Yes, it was probably my fault. I attracted people who wanted to be babysat. Don’t get me wrong if you are on my team right now and you are sticking with me. You are not who I am talking about. I am about to embark on a train that’s going to move fast and if you are ready to take hold we are about to go for a ride of your lifetime. But, you better be willing to work hard and be consistent or you will fall off.
I take full responsibility for my actions in the past and no longer will I be accepting people who need hand holding and babysitting. I am not technical support, I am not your babysitter, I am a leader and if you want to learn how I did it then pay close attention because we are about to make your head spin and you can either choose to come along or you can stay behind. It’s all up to you.
Bottom line to the painful MLM truth is no whiners, complainers, nay sayers, cry babies, beggers or weak minded individuals, this club is for action takers only. See you at the top!
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Woot! I love this post.
I have once heard Mark Hoverson said something like “Why it’s better to leave your team in the dust”. I pondered on this for a while, and later noticed it make sense.
Leaders will make it no matter what. With, or without their upline. They hit an obstacle, they climb over it. They have 3-4 obstacle, they say “How do I solve this problem”, instead of “I can’t do it, I give up”.
For people who are serious, you simply need to tell them very simple instruction and they will run with it. I remember you giving me 2 very valuable advices that had great impact to me, which really only took like 1 paragraph each.
They are:
1.) “Welcome luke to blogging challenge”
2.) “You are crushing in leads generation. Now you need to work on your conversions”.
In my workplace, I realized when I babysit people, they never learn. They make the same mistakes over and over again, and it really is a waste of time. When I decided not to help anymore, they are forced to learn themselves and really understood how to solve a problem.
Again, thank you for your leadership in sharing this post!
Thanks Luke! You are awesome and I am so proud of you. You are the perfect teammate. You listen and follow instructions and run with it! For that I can’t wait to see you on stage one day!
Well, put, I have watched you from the start and it is refreshing to see someone that has made it.
Congratulations.
Lance
Awesome love it that you have been around from the beginning. Take care and stop by again soon.
Amen Michelle. You hit the nail on the head. One MUST be an action taker to succeed in network marketing. There are no excuses when tools are provided to foster ones success.
Thanks LaToya and glad you stopped by to share your response. I appreciate that.
Well said Michelle. I have heard this said many times by many of the top leaders in this industry and it is true, the negative people will drain your energy. We must maintain our own energy or we will burn out ourselves.
This is what makes MSLP so valuable is their training content is all the step by step videos they have in the back office now. There is no reason for anyone to say they don’t know how to do anything, the training is already there. (So much of it)
All the best and thank you for your training as well!
Robert Dorsey
I know and you would be surprised at how many people fail to do the steps in MLSP to make it happen. Thanks for your comment and for stopping by.
Whilst I am not at your level yet Michelle – I have been feeling exactly the same in my own business – I have taken people on who are “needy” and not “deserving” of my time and from now on I’m taking the same attitude, if people don’t show up to my training webinars where I am giving them everything they need, then I’m not going to spend time repeating myself – this is not leverage, it is exactly as you say – “babysitting”!
I know spending time repeating myself is the killer! Nicky you are in a good place. We just need to keep putting out the content and those who want to come along will. It’s all about attracting people who don’t need to be babysat or it will suck the wind out of us.
I just want to say, this was a great article! Thank you Michelle! I’m still young and have a pursuit to overcome all obstacles and change my life. My why would be because I don’t want to be one of those people who are in debt, like Dave Ramsey said “I’m sick of being sick and tired” I’ve seen what happens when my sisters, father and other family work so hard, yet end up way over their head in debt. I have to think, either way I’ll be attending school again. Either way I look at it, ill be paying $40k in loans for the next several years, or I get involved somehow where I’m earning residual income to later be financially set. Michelle you have a great heart, and continue your life living with the passion you have.
Have an awesome day!
Theodore Rhoades
Thanks Theodore…..awesome response and I love your “why” I can hear your passion behind it.
Thanks for your leadership and clarity Michelle.
You’re not being harsh, but you are being mature. An old teaching expression goes, “what we dig for ourselves becomes our own possession.”
The goal of real teaching (leadership) is to equip people to dig for themselves and truly learn. People don’t value what they don’t work (dig) to earn. I had to learn this the hard way in the classroom. It applies to life as well. Remember the story of the teenager who doesn’t take care of Dad’s car but takes immaculate care of his own?
Thanks for the great post and helpful insights.
Thanks Kelley love how you put that response to my post. Have a GREAT day.
Thanks, Michelle. Good advice. I will follow it!
Kathy Rex
Michelle, all I can say is that you definitely deserve to cut the apron strings on those who don’t desire it enough for themselves. In fact, in all honesty, I’ve been waiting for you to write a post just like this saying you have. This is true because your mentoring programs in the back office of MLSP are bar none, and it is enough for those who are truly desirous for success to access and implement to achieve and match your level of success. I know because it calls out to me every day, whispering, ‘Juli, this is the KEY.’ And, boy oh boy, the thought of you taking off now at a faster pace than ever before sets my heart to dancing. You inspire me to no end! With utmost respect, Juli
Awww you are so sweet! Love the fact that we are getting to know each other.
I heard that from a training session. Most leaders want people who are willing to put in the extra time and do the work. I am very new at this but I am going to give it my all to succeed. Back in the 80′s when there were very few women in law enforcement, people thought I would not make it through the academy. I was the only woman there. I showed them and was the third female to make it on the State Police. I am so determined to make it in this business that I can’t wait till the day I can go back to my husband and prove to him that I did it. It is too bad you had to have those kind of people under you. In this field, I noticed that you have to grab hold and go with it. Be grateful that you do have a mentor that will guide you but at some point you have to spread your wings and fly.
Hey Michelle,
Awesome post! MLM, to me, is about becoming an individual. Yes it is a team sport, but if you aren’t looking to stand on your own 2 feet, dig in and get on when no-one is about, I fear you will fail.
Keep being awesome Michelle!
All the motivation, tips and advices become useless when one doesn’t find the strengths within to move on. There are many instances that I rely too much on others and I realized how it limits me from actually learning the crucial things. There are things that I need to unleash myself.
Great post! I love your passion. Working for yourself is definitely not for whiners. You need to really want it and be willing to work hard! Thanks for being honest and sharing your heart.
very nice text, i like your style which is honest and objective. The most articles in the scene smell like ads, or like a fairy tale. Big words, amazing numbers and very simple tips and tricks. And that’s why i find your thinking close to me. MLM isn’t an easy way to get rich. Yeah, sometimes it is painful. It is one of the hardest ways to make an easier living:)
It is painful …isn’t it?
Watching smart, capable people sit and wait for something.
Watching them NOT take control of their own situation and wait for
someone other than themselves to do what needs to be done.
I wasted years trying to help people who had “potential” who could never see it in themselves.
I wanted to SAVE THE WORLD.
But in the end on the road to success we all learn
that people can only save themselves.
Some get angry at us..say we have changed and throw stones…
But in reality it is that we have lost our egos
and moved on recognizing that we are not saviors and that
we can only lead and inspire but we can not “make it happen
for a soul”
You are right…to me it is a MYSTERY why people who have the exact same tools that we have in MLSP can’t follow simple directions and
start generating leads.
Anyone who can’t …doesn’t want to.
Does that make me “cold and uncaring” to say that?
Or does it make me even more of a leader to grasp that we can
only help those that will EXECUTE and submit to grooming and correction.
My line is that “I can’t teach you how to swim if you won’t get in the pool”.
If people would just get in the pool they would realize there is more help than they can imagine.
Congratulations Michelle.
You have run the gauntlet and come out a shining example of what is possible.
Anyone can…Few will.
YOU did.
Awww thanks Diane! I just saw this. I love the getting in the pool comment. So so true! Love ya!
No cry babies are welcome on your train. Haha. That is pretty understandable. It is pretty amazing how you put together this post so late in the night!
Congratulations Michelle…
I had to get to that place and it took me a couple years to figure it out. I remember my early days I was like a mother hen to my new partners and it was my “I’ll help you every step of the way, we’ll schedule coaching calls and I’ll show you step by step, hand in hand, how to do things.”
And what did I get in return?
Well, Mark Hoverson lovingly tells me I’m “Motherly”. Ann Seig and I were chatting after breakfast one morning at an event and I made a comment to someone about how their behavior will result in natural consequences and she immediately called me on it and cracked up… “Debbie you are being motherly!” We had a good laugh because Michelle, you and I have that desire to want to nurture…
But we can’t. We have to empower, lead and role model… Great leaders lead by example, not by hand holding.
It reminds me of a baby chick who has to fight and struggle to crack the shell in order to emerge into this world. And if it receives help, it cannot survive or thrive. The chick has to go through the pain and struggle to become strong and healthy.
I resonate with what you’re saying and with Diane also.
I have brought in hundreds of people into my businesses, GRN being one and like you and like Diane, I’m astonished at how people just will not take the initiative to figure stuff out.
And it seems they won’t go get the help they need to get off their stuck. A simply solution would be to hire a coach for an hour and say “here’s where I’m stuck, unstick me” and BAM! They’ve moved on.
I stopped hand holding a long time ago. I lead by example and inspire others to just go after it. I give them the tools, like MLSP and other materials and training and I EXPECT them to get busy and learn, implement and be about their journey to success.
Most often it doesn’t happen. But the ones who want it, set their goals and dreams and their “why” as you say, will do it. They’ll show up.
You’re a superstar Michelle…
PS: Didn’t proof read so it’s entirely possible I said something that doesn’t make sense. hahahah
Thanks Debbie, I am glad you stopped by and I certainly agree that we have that motherly instinct. No more though and already I see that it has up-ed my game! You are a superstar too!
For people who are serious, you simply need to tell them very simple instruction and they will run with it. I remember you giving me 2 very valuable advices that had great impact to me, which really only took like 1 paragraph each, thanks for the post, keep up the good work.
Michelle first I would like to congradulate you on your success. Nothing in life worth while is easy. What you wrote was very insightful. It reminds me of a mountain summit attempt I was reading about. The climbers had the best guides, supplies etc but climbing is dangerous and in order to survive a person must at times tap internal energy reserves they didn’t even know they had. The success or failure was not measured by reaching the reaching of the summit but by how many when danger set in mustered what was needed to return home alive. Laziness and giving up has no place on a climb and to make it there and back a persons why seems to have to be bigger then just saying I want to reach the top. The will of the person to perservere to 6 and 7 figures to the top etc must be strong enough and unique enough to the person to always serve as a all terrain powerful driving force that like a laser beam keeps the person focused on the goal.a great mentor can provide great inspirtaion but ultimately it is the focus and seriousness of each person that will determine if they have a big enough defined reason to get to and always stick with their goal or give up.On a climb a person understands what it means if they decide they can not reach within and do what is necessary to stay the course. It is always important that a person not lose sight of a goal but you are definately right it must be much more well defined and I can tell in a sense it must be seared into how a person thinks because it takes more to do things that are worthwhile and difficult in life then just wanting something. We live on a world of action and a person must do to succeed. Michelle you should be proud of yourself for each person you were willing to help and also know that things have a cause an effect in life just by your goodness to try to help you did great things.Thank you for what you wrote. It was very interesting a shed light on certain facets of human nature. Just know that the kindness and the way you described how you give so much of your time shows that your an extroadinary person. What you wrote about you need to have more of a reason then a person lists as having own hours etc was probably the best mentoring advice that you could have given for something a person should learn to do to reach any imporant goal in their life. What you said had to be said and it is good you said it. It was inspiring.
Dear Michelle and Bill
My heart goes out to you it sounds as though you’ve had some people you cared about let you down. I tend to be a caretaker as well and know that it can be disappointing when you invest your heart and soul into someones well being and see your efforts discarded. Again my apologies for the heart ache.
I’ve been contumplating the MLM industry for a short time now after being contacted by a friend wanting me to get involved in the Kyani health supplement team. I began researching the MLM opportunity to see the changes that have occured over the years since good old “AMWAY” of which I didn’t only try once but twice. I didn’t say I was a Brain Scientist HaHa!! With no system in place or structure the good old ask all your family, friends or pull out the phone book and cold call went about as far as you can imagine.
I ran accross MLSP and was amazed at the opportunity that it appears to offer. I signed up for a 14 day trial so that I may do a little more research in todays methods. This is where I was introduced to Michelle and her methods of doing business. There is no doubt the amount of effort that you guys are putting into your business. I am impressed to say the least!
I sent you one of your notices of interest a couple of days ago prior to reading your entry “The Painful MLM Truth”. Now I haven’t been able to sleep since I signed up with MLSP with the dreams of self success running through my head. But I have to admit that your entry above while a little rough, shocked me into rethinking my motives.
I am 47 years old and have always had a taste for the expensive toys cars, boats, planes and anything else out of the ordinary. I have worked for the Department of the Navy for 25 years and have achieved great success in leadership roles. I direct coordinate and implement the loading and unloading of Missiles from US Navy Submarines. Problem solveing and thinking creatively to achieve a goal is not an option, you either do or you fail. I’ve attempted before to stretch out of the perverbial box to reach a higher level of success. At one time leaving the Federal Government to find my success in the Mortgage Industry. After drawing out all of my retirement to live on, I found that my timing stunk! This occured back in 1993 right when the Mortgage Industry suffered its first set back and caused even seasoned Loan Officers to go out of business. I fortunetly was able to return to Federal Service after floating around to several other jobs. My passion has always pushed me to the top of the organizations that I have worked for.
I make a very comfortable living and don’t need to make extra money, not that it wouldn’t be welcome. That’s not what this is about. I truely believe that we all have an image of ourselves from the time we are very little that we will gravatate too. I have become very adept to speaking to groups and leading organizations to accomplish great success. My image of myself is in a much more public enviroment in speaking, teaching and excelling to a higher level than the enviroment I am currently in will allow.
In closing I welcome your consideration to whether or not we would be a good match in the business world. I am loyal and in search of a Mentor and open to discussions in respect to company’s to represent depending on good financial prospectives. If I’m a person of interest to you I welcome a one on one conversation.
Sincerely
John Foltz
1-360-874-0778
Seems to me a good deal of this comes down that old adage about giving a man a fish vs. teaching a man to fish, but the catch is that a lot of folks aren’t yet hungry enough yet to make the effort to learn how to fish for themselves. I can appreciate the challenge that comes with making a decision to expect more from those that you invest your time with. Although some will not appreciate or understand that decision, in my opinion you serve them better by doing so.